For most of my teenage and young adult life I lived in a perpetual state of “I wish a N**** would” The angry Black man who’s very state of being was a Public Enemy soundtrack. My high school yearbook quote was by Melly Mel: “Don’t Push me cause I’m close to the edge”, coupled with a picture of me puncturing a Dean’s car tire with a knife with my roommate on lookout duty (totally true story).
I was mad all the time even when I really wasn’t. A combination of feeling like the feared, misunderstood, hunted and persecuted. I was the quintessential NYC stereotype, with the perpetual mean mug, regardless of what my mood or temperament was really like. I stayed in the NY state of mind, constantly on edge and ready to pop off at the drop of a dime. Crowded subway rides with broken AC were only an excuse to wish someone would bump into me or heaven forbid step on my Timbs or white on white AF 1’s. READ MORE